


holy fuck coming out is scary

by eli0is0bored



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Coming Out, Family Feels, Family Fluff, Fluff, Internalized Homophobia, Other, Yuri Plisetsky Swears
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-05
Updated: 2020-12-05
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:46:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,162
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27894040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eli0is0bored/pseuds/eli0is0bored
Summary: Yuri was so fucking scared, what if his grandpa hated him?Yuri decides its time to come out to his grandpa, but... that shit is hard
Relationships: (mentioned) - Relationship, Nikolai Plisetsky & Yuri Plisetsky, Otabek Altin/Yuri Plisetsky
Comments: 10
Kudos: 73





	holy fuck coming out is scary

**Author's Note:**

> !!!!!!!TRIGGER WARNINGS!!!!!!!!  
> INTERNALIZED HOMOPHOBIA, SMALL PANIC ATTACK, HOMOPHOBIA

Yuri loved his grandpa, he was basically his whole world, he was the person who raised him and made sure he was healthy, he did things that his real parents should’ve done, but Yuri didn’t really think about his parents, they left him, and in his opinion, to hell with them, if they didn’t want him then at least they didn’t keep him. If they kept him and hated him, life could be much worse than it was now. Yuri knew that. His grandpa loved him; he knew that as well… So why did he feel so _fucking nervous_.

His grandpa loved him, he always said he loved him no matter what, but what is this was something he couldn’t come back from. Yuri remembers how hard it was for Otabek to come out to his parents, they screamed and cried and wondered at how such an abomination could exist. The only one who stood up for Otabek was his sister… Yuri had no other blood family than his grandpa.

Even just the thought of his grandpa not accepting him made his throat tighten up, it made him sick, but he knew that he had to tell him. Before he told him, he just wanted today, Yuri just wanted a nice day today, he wanted to eat good food with his grandpa, watch a movie and then make pirozhki. He wanted to have one more nice day in case everything went wrong. It was probably selfish, but he didn’t care enough to even notice.

As selfish as it sounded, maybe it didn’t sound selfish, maybe it was just him overthinking, but in his head it sounded selfish, but Yuri wanted to see his grandpa smile one more time before he came out. He wished he let Otabek come, but that might be a little much, plus… Otabek was in Almaty trying to get his sister to come to Russia with him.

The room was warm, warmer than it should’ve been for Russia, it made him feel trapped, but he couldn’t just leave, not without doing this first. He hated keeping Otabek a secret from his Grandpa, he hated how that he couldn’t tell him without almost breaking down. He knew Otabek hated it too, but he was able to swallow that because he knew that Yuri wasn’t ready

Yuri felt like he couldn’t breathe, his throat struggled to much to even get air, he knew he was breathing but it felt like he was suffocating, his chest felt to tight, was he even looking straight? His grandpa put his warm hand of Yuri’s shoulder, “Yuratchka? What’s wrong?”

That pulled Yuri out of his head for a second, he looked up at his grandpa, “I- I’m fine…”

He looked extremely skeptical, his eyebrows crunched together as he replied a simple, “Okay, let me know if you feel- “

“I need to tell you something.”

His grandpa nodded his head, he looked more concerned than anything, he put his hand on Yuri’s head and ruffled his hair slightly, probably trying to calm him, “What is it?”

Why was this so hard? Why couldn’t he breath right? What if this was a mistake? So many thoughts ran through his mind that he couldn’t even keep track on any of them, Yuri clasped his hands in his lap and fidgeted with them, something he always did when he was anxious. He took a deep breath, “Grandpa, you- you know Otabek, right?”

“Da.”

Yuri had to count his breathe before he could speak again, coming out to Yuuri and Victor was so much easier than this fucking shit. “Well, him and me have gotten closer.”

He could tell his grandpa was getting slightly annoyed by how slow this was going, but even he knew this sounded like a difficult subject, so he stayed quiet, only nodding slightly as a confirmation.

“Grandpa… you’ll- you’ll always love me, right? N-no matter what?”

Tears rolled down Yuri’s face, the way he asked it almost sound like a child, it took a lot to remember that Yuri was _still_ a child, no matter how much he hated being treated as such, his grandpa took his hand, “Of course, Yura. Did something happen?”

Yuri nodded a little bit, unable to speak for a second, his throat felt tighter than it ever had, he almost couldn’t take the warmth that came from his grandpa’s hand, it was too much, he let out a small sob, “I- I-“

His grandpa grabbed both of his hands, “Yura…? Did he do something to you?”

Yuri shook his head, his grandpa suddenly wrapping him in a hug, just like the ones that he gave when Yuri was a child, warm and comforting, “You know if he did you can tell me.”

“He- he didn’t _do_ anything, its- Grandpa… I’m gay.”

Yuri almost whispered that last part, his eyes filling with more tears as everything he had been holding in came out in one big explosion, his back shook with sobs as his grandpa placed a warm hand on his back and rubbed circles, he lifted Yuri’s chin a little bit with his other hand, “Yuri… please don’t cry.”

_Wait-_ Did his grandpa… just say _please-_ Yuri stared at his grandpa, and to his surprise, his eyes were full of tears as well, his grandpa hugged him again, “Did you think I would be mad?”

“Y-yeah- “

“I could _never_ be angry at you about something like this.”

Yuri’s eyed widened, “You’re not mad?”

As his grandpa released him, he gave Yuri his cup of tea to sip on, “Of course not, Yura… I’m sorry if I ever made you feel like you couldn’t tell me something like this. I always love you, no matter what.”

Yuri’s lip wobbled, “I thought you would hate me.”

“Yura, listen to me. You are my everything, I have raised you since were a baby, you are practically my child, I could never and would never be mad about this. All that matters to me is that you are happy and that whoever you love treats you right. I’m sorry if I did something to make you think you couldn’t tell me this.”

Yuri almost couldn’t believe what he was hearing, if he couldn’t talk before then he certainly couldn’t talk now, he just sat there, his eyes wide, and his grandpa hugged him. Yuri had forgotten how much his grandpa used to hug him when he was a child, the way he hugged him right now made him feel little again, it- it was nice.

“I love you, Yura.”

Well there goes any last chance of self-control he had as Yuri broke down… again. That was okay though, he was young, and he just did something that is unreachable for some people.

So, his grandpa held him until he had calmed down to the point of nearly sleeping, before Yuri could fall asleep, he muttered a few words, “I love you too, Grandpa.”

**Author's Note:**

> A/N  
> Hey everyone, it’s me and I wanted to say some important shit. Coming out is an incredibly hard and brave thing to do, I would like to applaud everyone of you who has every come out to a family member or friend. As a pansexual genderfluid person, I’ve have had to come out many times and not everyone had been very accepting.  
> And if you haven’t come out then that’s perfectly fine, coming out is, again, very hard to do, so for those who haven’t come out, I would like to remind you that no matter what anyone says that you are important and valid and perfect in all of your own different ways.  
> I would like to remind everyone that no matter what you identify as or who you are that you are 1000% valid and that you are loved. Remember to stay safe and that you are never alone. My goal by writing this was to show that someone will always accept you, whether it’s your grandparents, your friends or just a random stranger on the internet, you are loved and so very valid. I love you all  
> ~ Author (aka Eli) <3  
> (pronouns- they/them, he/him, xe/xem and moon/moons)


End file.
